Writing The Column

Writing The Column

It's that time again. I'm on a deadline for my quarterly column in Your Family magazine. I always panic and then miraculously come up with a topic at the last minute. I'm using this blog today as my warm-up. Between the total silence of my current study room at the library and my 24 ounces of Pumpkin Spice coffee I am hoping that I get something together soon. We can only hope.

This is nothing new. I can write a novel, four actually, but not under pressure. I wouldn't be a very good war reporter I guess, so you can strike that one from the list. By the time I started the story, overthought the topic and deleted it as many times as I do my column, the war would be over. So, there's that. My talent is limited.

I do not suffer from writer's block. Nope. I have a problem with performance anxiety. If I do it on my own time, I'm good to go. If I wait until the last minute I worry it's not good enough, the topic is stupid or my editor will fire me. I imagine him calling me into his office and shouting "THIS IS TOTAL CRAP. YOU ARE FIRED!" Then, they'll replace me with Gloria, The Greenhouse Goddess who will regale readers in the Verona area with tales about her Venus Flytrap.  

So, there's that. I guess there are worse things in life but if I want to actually get to the point where I pitch my silly Roseville novels to some agent working on commission for a second-rate publisher, I'd better hang onto this gig. In addition, maybe I should learn to stop writing run-on sentences.

I usually get my best ideas in the middle of the night. I wake up and write the whole blasted column for the next edition in my head. This is usually about three days after I submitted the last one to my editor. You know what they say about the best laid plans...well, it also works for columns too. Not once have I published any of those Pulitzer Prize winners, just saying.

So, here are the ideas I'm noodling now...you know the story about the Frenchman who wore the SAVE FERRIS t-shirt to the lighthouse? Yeah, I think that could work until I remember that the last time I wrote about the lighthouse trip was way back in April. Hmm..nope.

Then, I started on a good thread and had a column about how people are crazy. Stay with me here. I'd kind of like to encourage people to laugh at everyday events. For instance, our library has an auto buzzer lock that unlocks ONLY on the strike of 9AM. No yanking, screaming, pounding on the glass doors works. So, every time I volunteer I watch people race into the parking lot like they are going for the pits in the Indy 500, park, jump from their cars and run to the front door of the library and yank on the front door only to find it LOCKED. Hello...did they not see the ten of us on the sidewalk also waiting for 9AM to roll around? Idiots. Hmm. guess not. Ok, if I worked that story up a bit it might fly. But, after I produce a witty punchline, then what? I also can't call people idiots. My editor wouldn't like it and say that everyone will know what library I'm talking about and he'll be mad when he starts to get phone calls or letters to the editor about my column. That could also lead to my demise.

The only time anyone has ever complained about my column was over a pumpkin pie recipe. I don't remember what the entire deal was, but some lady wrote in and said I didn't state where the recipe came from. Listen, every can of pureed pumpkin has the same recipe. WHO CARES? Whatever. I personally gave Libby's the credit and she was satisfied. My editor just laughed. Meanwhile, he was dealing with fires, murders and his own weekly deadline so hey, I guess he does have a sense of humor. 

Every three months I tell myself I'm done as a writer. My creativity has dried up. I mean what are the chances of continuing to come up with ideas here? Probably much higher if I started outlining my topic before D Day aka-Deadline Day. But that will never happen. I have quilts to make, cupcakes to bake, shopping to do and frankly I'm not that detailed as a writer. Which, probably explains a few things right there. My husband has a blog. He has his pieces all scheduled out ready to auto-post until March of 2020! He's an overachiever. 

I've often thought about becoming a comedian. This would be in addition to my profitable writing career. I could stand on stage and tell people all kinds of funny stories. Yep, for about three nights. Then, I'd be out of ideas. So much for that. 

Although, with the right audience I could spin that SAVE FERRIS t-shirt story many different directions. 

It's just a thought...

Time to get back to staring at my empty Word Document...wish me luck. 

Rhonda 

Back To Normal Again

Back To Normal Again 

Sept 30 

We decided to come home from our vacation a day early. Our last stop which I didn't blog about was a bit disappointing. We were driving along on Thursday and thought hey, let's overnight it at Battle Creek, MI. Sounds like fun. There must be a museum we can walk around with vintage cereal displays and something about the Kellogg brothers. We recently watched a mini series about the two brothers on The History Channel and thought it would be interesting to stop in Battle Creek sometime and see what was still there from the old days. 

Not much. Our first stop was the Kellogg company. We parked in the visitor parking lot and made our way into the lobby. We walked up to the reception desk and asked about looking around at some of their displays that were precariously about twenty feet down a long marble hallway behind the reception desk. We knew they stopped doing real tours years ago, but could we just walk down and see those displays? We pointed, like the guy didn't have a clue they were behind him. 

"Sorry, folks. You need to have an appointment." 

"What? We can't just walk over there and look into the glass displays?" 

"No, I'm sorry. Do you know anyone who works here? Really, that's the only way I can let you through." 

I considered suggesting he call up my old buddy Tony The Tiger or my buddies Snap, Crackle and Pop but he was too young to find that humorous. I could tell. 

After that, with deflated enthusiasm we made our way to our hotel. It was an Executive Best Western, whatever that meant. So, we checked in and found our tiny tiled room. It was about as big as our guest room here in the condo but we made it work. 

Starving for excitement, we took off for the mall down the road a little later. We found Barnes and Noble without a problem but wow! The rest of the place was EMPTY. It is so sad for me when I see empty shopping malls. Makes you wonder how long before they are all torn down. 

The next morning, we decided we were too tired to do another day of just hanging out and wanted to get home and enjoy two days of pure relaxation-kind of a vacation from the vacation - before Dave went back to work today. 

It was a good decision. 

This am I ended up in urgent care with my silly foot. You know, from the first day at the lighthouse when it swelled up and hurt so bad I couldn't get it in any shoe? Well, I have had some severe pain since off and on. Yesterday, I drove to Target only two miles from our house and on the way home my foot was so painful I couldn't press on the brake or gas pedal without tears. I decided that was it. I needed to find out what was going on. 

After xrays and an appointment with a dr. who readily admitted to me she is not an expert in podiatry I was told she had no idea what was wrong and referred me to a specialist. That appointment is Nov 4. 

So, for the next two weeks I have to do some elevating, icing and taking it easy. I am not to drive but only around Verona, so I could easily pull over if I needed to in case my foot flares up like yesterday. As a person who likes to be on the move this will be a bit confining. But, I'll do it. Anything to figure this foot deal out. RRRR!!! But, what can I do but abide by the doctor's orders? 

That won't keep me from the three things I love to do-quilt, write and bake! So, I guess I'll live through the experience! 

Meanwhile, I'll keep you updated! 

The Quilter Cook 

Relaxing...Day 12

Relaxing...

Day 12

I went back and edited the previous few blogs so you are good to go if you want to reread them. I type very quickly and am notorious for skipping and repeating words. Some day maybe my fingers will catch up with my brain! 

Mr. Quilter Cook is off getting his photos and although I'm all packed and ready to head out, I am taking time to just RELAX. He can be kind of um...focused when it comes to accomplishing things on a list. So, he's in his zone when he has ten lighthouses and/or covered bridges to find and shoot in a day. He doesn't have ten this morning, but two in downtown Detriot (I hope he makes it back) and one bridge in the Greenfield Village here in Dearborn. 

I know many may be asking why in the world I'm not going to Greenfield Village. Well, remember way back to the first day at the lighthouse when I popped my hairline fractures in my foot from standing too long? Yep. Well, ever since I have only been able to wear my sandals for shoes. The Village is a total living history town which will require a lot of walking. I am not going to risk it if I can't even wear proper footwear. I really wanted to go, but alas not this time around. I also wanted to do the Henry Ford Museum and houses, but those are also off the table. 

Mr. Quilter Cook is hoping to sweet talk the officials into allowing him to snap a photo of their covered bridge and get out of there, but I think that's probably doubtful. It's pretty $$$ and meant to be an all day adventure, so it doesn't make sense to pay for me to go if I can't stay very long. Or walk. 

The good news is that I was able to get some great sleep last night! It feels good not to fumble around in the morning in a daze. It's a brand new day! Let's get going! 

But first, coffee...

So, once Mr. Quilter Cook returns we will be turning west on our journey back towards Wisconsin! 

 It sure seems like we've been gone a very long time! 

But, the blogging will continue so be sure to check in! 

The Quilter Cook 

I Need Sleep

I Need Sleep

Day 10 

Before I begin, let me apologize for some of my blogs not being edited before publishing. I have had spotty Internet since I left Madison and my goal is to just keep typing as long as I have a good signal. I'll go back and edit when I get a chance. So, bear with me. It's all good. I know I have some work to do. Thanks. 

We had a crazy day today! The car was packed and we were off by 7:30! Neither one of us have slept more than 4-5 hrs a night since we started this vacation so leaving early has not been a problem.   

 Our plan for the day was to circle the mitten of Michigan. Man, let me tell you. There's not much over there except a few small towns and a sprinkling of gas stations. I couldn't even find a coffee shop to buy some caffeine to go! It was nuts. I don't know how people live in such remote areas and survive. We once lived 25 miles from Walmart and let me tell you that was roughing it. Oh, plus there was NO JoAnn Fabrics either...so...just sayin...

Mr. Quilter Cook stopped at a few lighthouses that were way out in the water which meant the whole tripod experience and hiking out on a pier about a half mile away to capture the photos. My personal rule now is that if I hold up my cell phone and I can't see it even after I zoom in, forget it. Time to go back to my crossword puzzle. It's not worth my time. 

We also had a couple of fun experiences I'll share. One lighthouse. Port Sanilac Lighthouse just made my heart melt. It's the first one I've seen that's privately owned. There's a fence around it with a sign saying if you trespass on the property you are committing a federal offense, so I didn't try to challenge that warning. However, I did take some beautiful photos. I just thought how wonderful it would be to live in a sprawling Victorian with a tower attached to it next to the lake. Ahh...Well, I know for one thing I'd open it to the public a couple of Saturdays a month and on afternoons in the summertime. It's gorgeous. It's a shame to keep it all closed up.  

The government occasionally puts lighthouses up for auction that they want to sell. We actually looked into a couple a few months ago online. One looked kind of cool with a house, tower and some land. Then, we learned the land it sat on wasn't part of the deal. Ok, so let's figure that one out.  Hmm

Another one was in the middle of a lake. It had a house inside. And a rowboat. Well now, that sounded like too much fun for us. Can you imagine that? I say scratch that one off the list. 

The final jaunt of the day was the absolute best. We took a car ferry to Harsens Island, MI in search of some range lights and a tower. It was fun crossing the crystal blue Lake Huron and then cruising around in search of our lights. I took a couple of videos while we were there. I thought about how fun it would be living there also, but then we saw a guy dropping sandbags around his house foundation and thought....uh...nope. That would get old very fast. Plus, I don't like snakes. 

It was kind of cool being just shy of Canada. Too bad we didn't bring our passports along. We could've zipped over the bridge! However, Mr. Quilter Cook didn't share my enthusiasm. One time when our oldest son was 18 and Mr. Quilter Cook and his father were all on a trip here in Detroit, they ended up on the other side. They thought they'd just pop over and back. No big deal, right? Well, it wasn't a big deal until they wanted to COME BACK. They were held for questioning for some time before the officials could verify their identities. Oddly enough, Mr. Quilter Cook's mom and I were already IN Canada on our way to teach vacation bible school with LAMP missionaries. WE were smart enough to have OUR PASSPORTS with us. We sailed right on through both directions with no trouble. The guys were released...eventually. Mr. Quilter Cook and Matthew haven't been too hip on returning to Canada since. 

Tonight we are in a very nice Best Western outside of Detroit in Dearborn, MI. In the morning, Mr. Quilter Cook will take off to shoot photos of a covered bridge and two lighthouses in the area. I have decided to stay here at the hotel and just relax. I need a day to just take it easy. Later, we will make our way down to Niles, MI. He has an appointment to meet again with some people to shoot not a lighthouse, but another covered bridge in that area on Friday. 

I may blog in the am tomorrow but not sure. I am secretly thinking maybe I'll just watch tv and sip coffee in my pajamas and order room service! Shh...don't tell Mr. Quilter Cook...our little secret...

The Quilter Cook 

  

And Now...Back To Our Vacation Day 10

And Now...Back To Our Vacation

Day 10 

First of all, I hope if you are reading my blog tonight that you are safe if you are in Iowa. Doesn't look too good out there. Stay safe! 

Mr. Quilter Cook and I were up before dawn today and headed out before 8am from Mission Point Lighthouse. I stripped the Abe Lincoln twin beds and replaced our linens with those that covered the beds when we arrived. I wiped down the bathroom and did a quick clean of the kitchen. All this in preparation for the next Keepers that would be arriving only a few hours after our departure. 

It was strange to think that I felt a little sad to leave after all we had been through. I wanted to get going on our trip, but I wondered if ever we would return. Would we be Keepers? Probably not at Mission Point. But, we'd do it again IF everything was up front and clear about duties and expectations ahead of time. We will never us say we hated our experience. Yes, it was most certainly challenging at times, but in the end it was good. At times, very good to excellent!

Our first lighthouse today was in Tawas City, MI. It was majestic! There was a beautiful brick Keeper house with a huge tower attached to the side right on the bank of Lake Huron! Lovely. Unfortunately, it was closed as many are and will be on our trip, so I read the signs for history and info. They also have a residence Keeper program. I noticed right away there was nothing for about three miles in any direction. That truly would be very remote! 

The next was about thirty minutes south. I forgot the name and do not have the sheet we use for mapping the lights each day in the hotel room, but Mr. Quilter Cook was determined to get it photographed. It is not accessible by land and so he had to set up his tripod on a dead end road on the bank of Lake Huron and use his very long lens to capture it. Some of these lights are deserted like this and I'd move on down the list, but not him!  

The final stop was outside Frankenmuth, MI. Many months ago, Mr. Quilter Cook had to contact several people on the FRIENDS group to gain permission to get close to a very secluded lighthouse not open to the public. Apparently, it's now located on some corporate land and everyone else is considered to be trespassing unless accompanied by one of these FRIENDS of the project.

So, when we got to Frankenmuth, I was dropped off at Bronner's Christmas Store -awesome!- at 2:30pm and he went off to meet his contact for the lighthouse. We were to meet up again at 4:30pm, but he didn't show again until around 5pm. He not only had gained access to the property to photograph the lighthouse, but was let in and was able to climb two floors of the tower and see blueprints of the proposed revitalization plans! He was very excited. In addition, one of the photos he took will most certainly be on our living room lighthouse display wall very soon. 

We walked around downtown Frankenmuth, which I highly recommend to anyone traveling the area, and bought some fudge and toffee and then had dinner at Cracker Barrel and now are at our hotel. 

I can't tell you how glorious it is to sleep in a nice hotel again with a pool and hot tub. 

I mean, aren't we ON VACATION? 

But the best thing of all is that we have NOTHING TO DO except RELAX and TAKE A SWIM tonight! 

Off to Deerborn, MI area tomorrow! 

The Quilter Cook 

The Keepers Take A Day Off

The Keepers Take A Day Off 

Day 9

Conveniently enough, your day off is the day before you leave here. Oh well, we kind of are thinking of it as free lodging now after our busy week. 

We started our day at the gas station/convenience store/grocery store/deli for coffee. I already used up my whole bag of Biggby coffee from last week and thought hey, let's keep the other tightly sealed up in the Lock N Lock uncontaminated by various insects. 

Next, we took a leisurely drive down the peninsula to Traverse City, MI for breakfast at a place called The Flap Jack Shack. Honestly, I think The Jolly Pumpkin and this place used the same marketing firm when choosing a name for their restaurants! LOL  I am happy to say that the one time I had to cover my coffee cup over with my hand was not to keep the gnats out. It was my non-verbal way to tell the roaming coffee waitress that I just couldn't drink a fourth cup. I mean, it was only breakfast. I had to pace myself. 

We then made our way to the Sleeping Bear Dunes National Lakeshore. Just a heads up. It's a national park. You will pay through the nose to just drive through, which is what we thought we'd do...but my oh my were we in for a big surprise! It was absolutely spectacular! For those who are friends on my personal facebook, you've seen the photos and I'm sure agree with me. It's one of those scenic drive parks where you stop at the scenic overlooks. Basically is it a huge sand dune area. If you've been to the Indiana Dunes, this is BETTER! At one spot, we parked and hiked up a small hill and kept hearing this wind but didn't know where it was coming from and then when we reached the top of the boardwalk there were 50 mph winds! I couldn't hardly stand up straight. My time was limited. I snapped some shots and tiptoed back down the path in the rain that started blowing around. I took refuge in a pit toilet for shelter! Now, ANYONE who knows me is laughing their heads off. 

When I emerged, there came Dave down the hill with his camera in hand and we jumped in the KIA and got out of there. Soon enough, the winds calmed and all was well.For the first time in my life, I didn't even think twice of opening the door of a pit toilet and heading in! LOL

Later, we shopped in Glen Arbor, MI at Cherry Republic and had some lunch. It was so delicious! We also stopped in Cedar, MI and another small town that had a quilt shop. You may be shocked to hear it was my FIRST quilt shop stop the whole trip so far.

Finally, we made it back to Traverse City, MI and shopped at The Village at Grand Traverse Commons. Believe this or not, they revamped this gigantic old insane asylum into shops and condos. It's a little creepy to me but from the outside from what they've done looks remarkable. On the inside along the bottom floor they have made little unique shops. I didn't really get a great vibe from this place. There were photos of the old place, pictures of patients...I don't know. I couldn't work there. It really was weird to me. In addition, who would buy a condo at an old insane asylum? NOT ME, thanks. I wouldn't sleep a wink! Oh, so to top it off they give tours of old tunnels that are you guessed it...HAUNTED! Mr. Quilter Cook was all excited to sign up to go, too. But unfortunately, the tours are two hours long and the next one starts tomorrow at 10am. Too bad. Besides, I just didn't know how he was going to get all the way back to the lighthouse afterwards. I sure wasn't sticking around that long! NOPE. Not there. There's an eerie feeling about the place. I couldn't get out of there fast enough.

By that time, it was time to get back home again. On the way, we visited a winery and had some dinner. Upon our return, we have packed our stuff as much as possible in the car and prepared for our departure at 8am.  We have a schedule to keep and 6 lighthouses to visit tomorrow!

Oh, I can't close tonight before reporting to my son Mark Mossner that I CLIMBED TO THE TOWER! (Please note, for clarification I DID NOT say I climbed INTO the tower), but I poked my head up inside. It still counts.

We also spent some time on the beach since we had it all to ourselves. We said goodbye to our little spot on Lake Michigan and the lighthouse. It's a bit sad and I really wanted to do something in appreciation for the week.

So, I grabbed my trusty straw broom and swept down the steps of the lighthouse, down to the beach and the boardwalk one last time.

We can't leave the place looking shabby now, can we?

This experience will not be forgotten. Which reminds me. I get to write our story in the OFFICIAL logbook of the lighthouse tonight.

It will be my honor.

The Quilter Cook

P.S. Stay with us on the vacation by checking the blog! We have many more adventures before we return to Madison on Saturday! 

The Last Full Day Part 2 Day 8

The Last Full Day Part 2 

Day 8

I'd be lying to all of you if I told you I wasn't kind of happy and relieved to be done with our gig here at the lighthouse. It's been fun, interesting and I have to say challenging. I met over 1500 people in less than a week and talked personally to around 1479. That's a lot of conversions! However, it's time to keep this vacation moving along. 

Tonight, I'm sitting here with Mr. Quilter Cook as we munch on supper. We are enjoying some Stouffer's pizza bread and might end with some Milk Duds for dessert. I have just enough food to get us to Tuesday morning when we leave what we are now calling our Passion Project. 

So, if you read my earlier blog from today and saw the volunteer hours equaling 120 for the week collectively, I thought I'd explain myself. Here's how it adds up: 

Each Morning beginning at around 7am - Before Opening

* sweeping walks, steps down to beach and to parking lot and around log cabin on property 

*weeding flower gardens, watering the million half-whiskey barrels full of plants

*digging junk out of cigarette pails filled with sand around property and beach

*cleaning the huge commercial rugs for lighthouse and sidewalk before opening, pulling them off the fence from overnight and before replacing them on sidewalks and in lighthouse, sweeping areas clean

*cleaning grounds in general and unlocking gates 

*performing general household chores to perfection inside lighthouse just in case manager had a meeting in living quarters - which ironically never seemed to transpire

*Clean tower windows inside and out and re-sweep and vacuum any sand that had accumulated overnight on the steps leading up to the tower. 

*Start videos throughout visitor areas
*Count down starting cash for register, set up SQUARE Point of Sale system for the day, sign in online with manager to prove you didn't run away during the night.
*sweep down gift shop and entrance and museum on first floor once again
* Do a quick dusting of items in shop
*Hang flag and open sign at EXACTLY 10am.

10am-5pm  Gift Shop Duties 

*greeting visitors: smiles, smiles, smiles! 

*sharing history of lighthouse

*policing who goes up to tower and that they have paid for the ticket

*working register/Square POS system

* keeping inventory full 

*fetching tshirts, sweatshirts and etc. from wherever they may be stored...including the Captain Hook cellar 

*answering phone, giving winery and dining suggestions 

*Saying "I'm sorry, I do not know the answer to your question. I'm a volunteer light keeper for the week from Madison." Then, going into the whole spiel about the Keeper program.
*Watch to make sure things are going ok on the beachfront and that no pop-up weddings or artist groups have decided they will be squatters for the day. No weddings with chairs or over 5 total people allowed on grounds and artists may paint of course, but not in groups of more than three at a time, due to space. (Honestly, there WAS a wedding. We have photos. It was a beautiful bride in vintage lace and a serviceman in full Coast Guard dress uniform. We let it go. Good grief.)

After Hours Duties 

*Closing all the gates at EXACTLY 5pm

*Sweeping entire lighthouse down by hand ( I don't mean a broom. It's a real hand brush) as instructed by manager. See Tuesday's blog for full detailed instructions.

*Vacuuming between all cracks of wooden floor planks to suck up the sand. Supposedly, you couldn't run the vacuum over the cracks. The manager insisted EACH crack be done individually. Well, we ran the vacuum over it and had the same results, so there you go.( *Edit note: We found it interesting that when we were gone on our day off and the mgr. took over...no after duties were performed at all and the cracks were FULL of sand.)

*Washing tower windows with Windex and a rag, then sweeping with hand brush and vacuuming the tower area down. 

*Sweep all the walks, steps and pathways to parking lot - to and from the 1/4 mile from lighthouse (!) and down to the beach-again (probably your 15th time of the day) I used this as an excuse to get out of the gift shop every 90 min or so and talk with people outside. But I did work up a few blisters to prove I did actual sweeping as well.
*Windex all interior windows throughout lighthouse - not just the gift shop. All of them.

*Lock the log cabin AFTER you wash the exterior windows of lighthouse and cabin. Then, sweep all the visitor areas around the cabin to parking lot.
*Check inside the six porta potties for....well...whatever. We didn't have to clean them so we decided we didn't need to look inside them either. That was an executive decision on our part. If cleaning those were part of the so-called duties--that was the line in the sand for us. But alas, it all worked out. The cleaning company came each morning early around 6 and took care of those. We had enough to do.

In our free time, we also did the following:

*Cut grapevine leaves crowding steps to the beach 

*Cut out all dead hosta shoots around property

So, I lied. I guess that it was about 141 hours we volunteered in the last week. 

Tomorrow, we start our vacation FROM our vacation in Traverse City, MI! WE ARE OFF FOR THE DAY and leaving by 9am to RELAX! 

Tuesday, there is a tour bus coming in at 9:30. The manager and a local volunteer will cover it. So, we were asked to please be out by 9am. 

They'll need our parking space.  

The Quilter Cook